Should i?

Thinking about this many times..But never take it serious, even once. Sedang melaburkan saham besar today, terpikir untuk mengambil serious akan issue ini. Since i was a kid, i am so in passion with fashion designing. Until now..Bila belek baju kat kedai, terpikir patut ada itu ini, kurangkan itu ini, mulalah rasa macam "ini serasanya mak aku pun boleh jahit". sedangkan mommy boleh jahit, rasanya kalau belajar dari mommy, cepat kot aku boleh tangkap. I love art in many ways. From make-up to henna design, from music to painting..And this is part of art as well. I was thinking to buy sewing machine and start practice. Somehow, im thinking to move to ipoh, learn from my mom, machine and tools are there. no cost for a new beginner like me. Tapi, leaving KL is too hard for me.Abah and mommy called me many times, and talk about this. About leaving KL and stay with them in Ipoh. Abah, he want all his kids to stand in front of his eye balls, till then he will feel better. I miss it. I miss Ipoh, I miss the life surrounded by my own family. Abah once said, stay with him because we will never know till when each of us will live..Too scary to think about it! Considering about it, i just want to pack my stuff and stay with them. But the people, the life, the places, i prefer to stay in KL. When no one know me. When people never care with every single step I take. When i free to do things I want. When people never bother....Hmmmm.... Still, Its good for me to invest into business, even risky is everywhere. But still, its the only way to make money and catch my dream..Thinking myself dreaming to be a designer, its too shameful. too shameful to share with anyone ;( hahahhahaha! But i had a dream, i have a small boutique, and Mecca with her younger sister Medina running here and there. I still have the vision, clearly. hmmm... dilemma!